Q. How should I talk with children about the death of a family member and about death in general?

A. First, it is important to be honest. The Bible presents death as a tragic "reality of life" in a fallen world, and children (like adults) need to know and understand this.

 The prospect and reality of death, of course, can be frightening, sad and painful for children as well as for adults. Therefore (secondly) children also need the reassurance of the Gospel message, communicated in clear and simple language that they can understand. They need to know that Jesus himself experienced death on the cross to win victory for us over sin, death and the devil (Romans 4:25; Col. 2:15). He rose triumphantly on Easter morning, and by his resurrection has defeated death forever (1 Corinthians 15). Through his Word and sacraments, he now shares his victory with all who believe (Romans 6:4-5; Luke 22:17-18). All those who trust in Jesus, who are baptized into his death and resurrection, will live forever with him in heaven, where there is no more pain, suffering or death (Rev. 21:1-4). When Jesus comes again, we will be re-united with our Christian loved ones and with all believers to enjoy life in heaven forever with our loving, living Savior (John 11:23-27).

By the power of God's Spirit working through Word and sacrament, children, too, can cling with strong and simple faith to the precious promises God gives us regarding Christ's victory over sin and death (John 11:25-26; John 14:2-3; John 14:19, etc.). Sharing, memorizing and discussing these promises (and singing about them in treasured Easter hymns and songs) are wonderful ways of helping children deal with the death of a family member or with more general concerns about death.